some brief football news

A football match lasts approximately 90 minutes. Today I played half a match. 45 minutes. I scored 9 goals. That's a goal every 5 minutes. A triple hat-trick. I think it was Kenny Dalglish who once said, "it doesn't matter what level you're playing at, a triple hat-trick makes you a serious player." The school's U-11s were left reeling from my contribution.